Think Happy Thoughts
by somethingoftheunknown
Summary: "I wish I didn't do this."/"Hey.. You shouldn't think about that. Think happy thoughts."/"O-okay.." Sequel to "You Gonna Jump?"
1. Free Fall

**Okay.. I know, I know.. I haven't written in quite a while. But school won't let me write. And I know I promised some people this story a long time ago, I'm sorry it took so long.**

**And I know that most of you want my head on a stick (or on a silver platter, for my more classy readers), but please forgive me. This would probably be my last story in a while -try not to kill me- since I only wrote something because it's Christmas vacation. I'll probably write more in the summer which starts in March.**

**Anyways.. Enjoy.  
**

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She loses skin contact with everything.. only letting the air and the warmth of his body touch her. They are falling, head-first on to the pavement, arms wrapped around each other, and she's shaking. Shaking because she's scared, shaking because they were nearing the ground, and she's shaking because the look on Dan Humphrey's face was peaceful.

Her eyes are wide open, her mouth agape, her eyes filled with tears that don't escape because of the speed of the fall. Everything is moving so fast, she can't see anything other than the man falling next to her. But for some unexplainable reason, they haven't reached the ground. It feels as if they have been falling for hours, and the whole time, Blair was scared.

Chuck. Serena. Nate. Dorota. Harold. Elanor. Cyrus. Lily. Rufus. Anne. Howard. Roman. Vanya. Georgina. Vanessa. Jenny. Jack. Damien. Carter. Rachel. Kati. Isabel. Penelope. Nelly. Hazel. Amalia. Sophie. Courtney. Taylor. Anastasia. Marcus. Aaron. Bree. Olivia. Anyone who she has come across with at one point in her life. All of them were running through her head. Most of them she didn't really care for, and some she hated. Even less is the number of those she loved, and there was the few she loved unconditionally. But it didn't matter, she was never gonna see any of them ever again.

Then it struck her. She didn't want to do this. She regrets doing this. She would rather be on her bed right now, crying or watching movies or thinking about Chuck or plotting or even purging, than here, on the side of the building free falling in Humphrey's arms.

But again, it didn't matter. She was going to die, without even a goodbye.

_Hey Waldorf._

_What?_

_Remember the time when we were in that stupid Age of Innocence play back in high school?_

_Of course, why?_

_Nothing. I just thought it was fun._

_I recall that I wanted to chop your balls off during our performance._

_Haha.. remember that time when we plotted against Georgina?_

_Yes, I remembered I took away your scheming-virginity._

_And the time when-_

_Humphrey. What's with the flashbacks?_

_I just thought that those are the few occasions I was with you longer than a 'Hello Cabbage Patch -insert snide remark about shoes, clothes, hair, upbringing here-'._

_And that matters..?_

_Haha.. not really._

Blair looks at Dan and his eyes are still closed, and his lips hasn't moved. She realized that hers hasn't either. How were they talking? But instead of pondering on it further, she just closed her eyes with him.

_Hey Humphrey._

_Yeah?_

_I.. I won't be able to see Serena or Dorota or Chuck or Nate anymore. I wish I didn't do this._

_Hey.. You shouldn't think about that. Think happy thoughts._

_O-okay.._

_Don't worry, you'll get to see them later. Then you can tell Serena or Nate all about this and complain about my Brooklyn germs.. or maybe you can even go see Chuck, and forgive him._

_I won't be able to see them. You know I won't._

_Hey, remember what I said?_

_Oh yeah. Happy thoughts. By the way, I don't hate you._

_Really? That's good._

Blair opens her eyes, and sees him looking at her. He looks happy. That sent another set of shivers down her spine. She looks at him pleadingly.

_I don't want to stop talking to you yet._

Maybe if they keep on talking, they wouldn't have to face the inevitable.

_But we're out of time. Bye Waldorf, take care of yourself._

She closes her eyes and prepares herself, but no one can really be ready for this. Especially those who regrets.

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"We've got a double suicide jump." the detective said. "Probably lovers. The girl, Blair Waldorf, is quite famous around here. Hosts the best parties in town. A classic Upper East Sider with a pretty clean record. A few broken bones, but she'll survive." The detective continued reading, "The other one, Daniel Humphrey, no record too but obviously not quite as a star as the girl. He took in most of the fall, having the girl land on top of him. Dead on impact."

Detective Andrews looked at the screaming ambulances at his left. One taking in a unconscious girl and the other a body bag. He looked at the profiles again. A pretty girl and a happy-looking boy. He sighs. That's the only thing he could offer for this world.

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**Thank you for reading. Please review and tell me if you want it to continue.  
**


	2. Landing

**Hey. Yes, I'm back. I'm not really going to make a big deal out of it (except that I'm officially a teenager, Fyeah!), but I am going to apologize for the lack of stories/life in my FF account, Btw, totally loving the Dair on screen, can't wait for season 5! XD**

**Anyways, please enjoy.**

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This is the part where she wakes up in cold sweat. Her body shaking and memories of what she presumes to be last night linger on her mind too vividly. It takes her a few moments to take in her surroundings.

_I'm in my room._

Her whole body tensed. Why does she have the strangest feeling she's not supposed to be here? She stood up, and regretted the moment she did. She noted the difficulty in her movement, it seems like her head was floating off to somewhere, and has no time for silly things such as body movement.

"Woah, Waldorf." Dan Humphrey stepped into view and caught her. "Let's sit you down, okay?" They did as he said, and Blair looked around, feeling the room spin a couple of times before settling herself on the sight of Dan's face. Finally getting a clear view of his concerned face, tears welled up on her eyes. She suddenly wrapped her arms around him for the sake of feeling something that's there and tangible and_ real_. Dan's arms wrap themselves around her. "Hey, everything's going to be alright."

She doesn't think about how his actions and the feelings it's giving her doesn't seem completely foreign to her, because she started spitting out every thought that comes into her mind. "I-I thought we.. I j-jumped.. and y-you jumped too.. you were s-smiling.. I w-was terrified." She can feel her own tears soaking through his shirt but she doesn't stop it, and he doesn't say anything. "Then y-you d-died.. I think I died too.. b-but.. you were h-happy." She paused, but her feelings were still in a jumble. Then there was a quick change in her deamanor, she looked up at him with disbelief and confusion on her face (it's funny how it wasn't on _his_ face). "Why were you happy?" She was well aware how stupid that question was. There wasn't even a solid topic to base that question on, but her need for answers finally dawned on her, and for some reason the first question that comes into her mind is why the_ fuck_ would Dan Humphrey be happy leaving this world?

"I'm alive" was his only reply to her outrageous ramblings.

However, that seemed to be enough, because Blair felt an enormous weight lifted off her shoulders. As if all the bad things she has done in her life have been repented for. Which was absolutely insane because how could two words from _Cabbage Patch_ make her feel like that? She smiles a little because she's thinking like her old self again. She paused.. She was thinking like her _usual_ self again.

Then before she knew it, she's in the middle of watching _Paris When It Sizzles _with Dan and a tub of ice cream, _I'm totally going to get fat if we do this often, Humphrey. _She thinks about how it's so bizzare that she's having fun. The easy banter and the teasing, even the comfortable silences in where they just relax and appreciate the movie. She's _happy _to have him with her.

A few unerving thoughts crossed her mind, though. Like how she didn't see him when she awoke, and suddenly he was there stopping her from falling like he's been there all along. Or his lack of reaction and curiosity about why she acted the way she did. She wonders why he won't ask questions, or why him saying that he was alive comforted her more than it should have. She thinks about how she didn't notice him leave the room or even her arms when he set up the movie and got the ice cream. The ice cream even tasted weird, like it's not really there, as if she's eating from memory.

She then turns her attention back to the flat-screen TV. She knows she's watching that Audrey Hepburn movie, but she doesn't recall the scenes being played out. She's sure it's the right movie, though.

She looks at Dan the same time he does her, and she was met by a shocking sight. She saw something hideous in his eyes, something she hasn't seen so up close. She thinks that maybe she understands why Chuck was the way he is when he was forced to identify the body of Bart Bass after the crash, because for a moment, his eyes were the very picture of _death. _Then as quick as it appeared, it disappeared.

"Hey, what are you thinking about? I've never seen you so distracted during an Audrey Hepburn movie." He smiles his same gap-toothed smile, and she already started thinking that maybe she was just imagining things. "Don't worry, Waldorf. I won't tell if you don't."

In her head, she had so many questions, but she dismissed it all. She feels like she shouldn't think about these things. Something is stopping her form feeling sad, upset, or even curious.

So she just keeps her thoughts to things that make her _happy._

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**Thank you for reading, and _yes _I have missed you. Please review.**


	3. Crash

**Hey, all I'm saying is patience is a virtue. Note that this is a response to an anonymous review I received. It might spoil you of you check it out, but I didn't remove it.**

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_Who am I?_

She doesn't concern herself with the answer. It's a rather disturbing (and not to mention, cliche) question to wake up to, but fpr some reason, she decided that she couldn't be bothered with things that seemed so.. _irrelevant_. Besides, it started to rain, and she's too busy concentrating on the pitter-patter sound it makes. She loves the rain, Blair thinks-

Oh right. She was Blair.

"Blair!" She felt arms engulf her in a tight embrace.

"Yeah, I figured it out already." She said in an irritated voice, she already knew who she was. Wait, what was she thinking about again? _Rain.._

Selena pulled away, but still kept her hands on Blair's shoulders.

"What?" Selena looked confused for a second, but that was easily replaced by a bubbly smile that seemed unnaturally bright. "Anyways, you're finally awake!"

Finally? Surely she wasn't asleep for thar long. She just fell asleep while watching.. that movie with.. someone.. Blair tried to get a grip on the hazy memories that was quickly slipping away from her. Maybe she _was _asleep for that long. Maybe she was just drea- no, it's too real to be a dream. She was getting more confused every second, and it's even worse that this blonde kept suealing about how worried she was, and how happy she is.

"S-Selena, could you keep quiet for a second." Blair held up a hand to her temples. She was eating something cold, right?

"Selena? Blair, it's me, Serena." The blonde looked at her sternly.

"Yeah, yeah.. Serena, right." Blair closed her eyes tightly. That movie she was watching.. was about a movie..?

"Blair Waldorf?" The nurse came rushing in, clipboard and medicines in hand. "Dear," she said to Serena, "I need to be alone with your friend here real quick, you can call her family and tell them the good news."

Serena nodded, although a little bit hurt, and did as the nurse told.

Blair watched the retreating figure of her friend, and something dawned on her. She feels as if she's watching on slow motion as the hospital room materializes before her.

"Wait.. what?" Blair half-groaned as the questions in her head multiplied. "Why am I in here?" Blair asked politely, which surprised the nurse as she was expecting a tantrum of sorts from her, having done what she's done to herself.

"You would have to ask the doctor that. I'm sorry, dear." Blair frowned, she racks her brain for an answer but still, nothing comes up. The nurse sighs as she looks at Blair sypathetically. "You seem to be such a sweet girl."

Blair looked away guiltily, feeling like she's done something horribly wrong. She busies herself with staring at the IV that she just realize was stuck in her hand, she doesn't even bother thinking how she was sure that it wasn't there before Strange things have been happening and she feels as if she can't trust her memory anymore. She notes the rain splashing against the window. She likes the rain, it makes her feel as if-

"Oh my baby!" A familiar voice pulls her out her train of thoughts, and a new set of arms wrap themselves around her. The nurse left already?

"Yes, Mother." She replied weakly. She can see the eyes on her. There seems to be a lot of people but the only ones she could recognize are Serena and her mother. She'll just try to figure it out later, with the rest of the unanswered questions. "Where's Dan?" She didn't even realize she asked the question.

Everybody in the room froze but Blair didn't notice, she was too busy recalling a memory. She remembers soemthing about Dan and her laughing at her bed while watching a movie. What an odd memory.

"Dan Humphrey.." She heard someone say, and she pulls away from her thoughts. She looks up and see the miserable expressions in their faces, as recognition springs up in her mind. The anger in Serena and Nate, the hatred in Chuck, and the face of Erik, who is devoid of life.

"Humphrey's dead." Chuck spat out through gritted teeth. Everybody looked at him with disbelief ethced on their faces.

"What the hell, Chuck!" Serena shouted.

"Well, isn't it true?" he replied angrily.

"She didn't have to know this way!" she responded, eager for a fight. Just anything to take out the pain she's been feeling for weeks.

"Why? 'cause she'll be jealous? He succeeded and she's still here pretty much alive!"

"Shut the fuck up, man!" Nate finally spoke up.

Blair looked at them, seemingly unaffected. She just stared dumbly Nate and Chuck take it to the floor, exchanging punches.

_Humphrey's dead._

The nurses came in and pulled them off of each other.

_Humphrey's dead._

Blair's eyes widen.

_Humphrey's dead._

"Hey Blair, are you alright?"

Blair turned her head to the side. There, she finds her boyfriend's face looking back at her with sleepy but worried eyes.

"J-just a bad dream." She replies shakily. Dan pulls her to him and rubs circles on her back.

"They're back?" Dan kisses her on the lips. "Hey it's alright. I'm here." Blair rests her head on his chest. "Don't think about that anymore, okay?"

"Okay." She mumbled.

"Good."

"Mhm."

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**Thank you for reading, really. If you want to ask questions, sure, but beware, it might spoil you. Please review.**


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